Maybe I Can with Debbie Weiss

Ep. 98: Kim Rahir's Journey to Strength and Vitality

• Debbie Weiss

Share episode

Send us a text

In this episode of the Maybe I Can podcast, Debbie Weiss interviews Kim Rahir, a 60-year-old mother of three who defied her MS diagnosis and reclaimed her life by becoming the European Champion in Masters Weightlifting. Kim shares how she ignored her doctor’s advice and chose instead to rebuild her strength, ultimately leaving her journalism career in her 50s to become a health coach for middle-aged women. Now, she helps women tap into a wellspring of vitality by focusing on muscle reactivation and nourishment, proving that it’s never too late to flourish and thrive.



NEW! The Sprinkle Effect Book!
https://www.debbierweiss.com/thesprinkleeffect


***NEW FREE WORKBOOK**

Kickstart Your New Life with One Critical Step: A Practical Guide for Women Ready to Redefine Their Paths and Embrace New Beginnings.

DOWNLOAD HERE TODAY: https://www.debbierweiss.com/kickstart


MAYBE I CAN BEGIN TO CHANGE MY LIFE Enrollment is now OPEN!

This transformative six-module journey of self-discovery and empowerment includes a printable worksheet and offers lifetime access to all materials. Designed for those facing major life crossroads or simply seeking greater fulfillment, this course is your path to a more purposeful life.

LEARN MORE HERE: https://www.debbierweiss.com/beginchange


Work with Debbie! See all the ways you can work with Debbie to help you live the life you know you're meant for: https://www.debbierweiss.com/workwithdebbie


Get your FREE Preview of On Second Thought... Maybe I Can the book here: https://www.debbierweiss.com/freepreview


On Second Thought... Maybe I Can Book on Amazon: https://bit.ly/maybeIcanbook...

Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome to Maybe I Can, exploring possibilities, one sprinkle at a time. If you've ever found yourself asking is this all there is to life, then you're in the right place. I'm Debbie author, speaker, entrepreneur and coach, and every Tuesday I'm here to share a sprinkle of hope and inspiration. Together we'll uncover the more of hope and inspiration. Together we'll uncover the more More joy, more fulfillment, more prosperity, more fun. We'll share stories of transformation, actionable tips and that little nudge you need to take the next step. So let's embark on this journey of discovery and say maybe I can to a life filled with more. Ready to find out, let's get started. The Maybe I Can Show starts now. Welcome everyone to the Maybe I Can Podcast. I'm your host, debbie Weiss, and I am excited today to have Kim Rottier as our guest.

Speaker 1:

Let me tell you a little bit about Kim. She's a 60-year-old mother of three who was diagnosed with MS 10 years ago and decided to ignore her doctor's advice and muscle her way back to a happy life. Last year, she became the European champion in master's weightlifting in her age and weight category. Her journey inspired her to leave her career in journalism. In her age and weight category, her journey inspired her to leave her career in journalism in her 50s and become a health coach for middle-aged women, with a big focus on reactivating and rebuilding muscle. Today, she helps women tap into an abundant source of vitality. It works by reactivating and maintaining muscle and eating to nourish and flourish. So, kim, welcome to the show. Thanks for having me. I'm excited to talk to you. You've got some story, so I'll ask you. The same question I ask all my guests is can you tell us about a time when you went from a defeated I can't attitude to an empowered? Maybe I can mindset.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely so. When I was diagnosed with MS, it was actually my second brush with autoimmune illness. Two years before I mean no more than that. I think a few years before I had been in hospital with a one-off that's called Guillain-Barré. It's a syndrome that comes and goes. It's brutal. It comes from one day to the next. I had spent six weeks in a hospital, paralyzed from the hips downwards. It was traumatizing, dehumanizing. It was a horrible experience.

Speaker 2:

I got over that, I got out of that, I learned to walk again, I was told I was healthy and then, two years later, I was diagnosed with MS and I thought, no, this is just too much. This is such a low blow. Come on, I've just got over this. I learned so much from the first illness. I changed my perspective on life. I was grateful for everything and then I thought no. And then the doctor said I needed lifelong treatment and I fought with him because I really thought, no, I can't do this. I can't, I can't give my power away again. It's not, it's, it's not doable. I this is not me.

Speaker 2:

I think this is something that many people feel like. You know, even though I didn't have like a precise plan in my life like some people have. Like they say, with 30 they want a family and with 40 a house. But I't have this. But still I had an idea of who I wanted to be, what I wanted my life to look like. It was all gone and I thought, no, I can't do this.

Speaker 2:

And then I felt this thing stirring inside of me where I thought, okay, I have this diagnosis, but I can walk, I can move. But I can walk, I can move, I can do something, I can focus on something that I can do today. The future might be scary, but I don't have to give in to this feeling of powerlessness, of hopelessness, and there's something I can do today. And I started training for strength, lifting heavy, and it changed absolutely everything. It's something that now I like to call actually matter over mind, because when you start working your body, your mindset follows, you feel confident, you feel like you can do things, you're proud of yourself, you feel like you can trust and count on your body, which is really a big thing with autoimmune disease and just this little stirring inside of me like maybe I can do something to get my power back. That was this flip of the switch, like you mentioned, and that changed everything for me switch, like, like you mentioned, and that changed everything for me.

Speaker 1:

Do you think that you were let's go back to so that first illness that you had years before? Did that come out of the blue? I mean, you were paralyzed from you know, the hips down. Did it all of a sudden? And and were you active before that?

Speaker 2:

yeah, it's what it was like it's really, from one day to the next it's. It's a very violent uh syndrome, uh, and it's very common among soldiers. I'm thinking about this today because I think I I had three small kids, a full-time job, working shifts. Um, I think maybe I was soldiering along a little bit there. Um, it hit me from one day to the next. I had something like flu for three days and then got back up like we do and did everything that I could. And then when I picked up my kids from school, I noticed that I was seeing double. So that was mighty scary and I knew I couldn't ignore my way out of that.

Speaker 2:

One Went to the doctors, they sent me to the hospital and over the next three weeks, like, I progressively lost the sensitivity and the use of my legs. And then after six weeks in hospital, when I got home just in time for Christmas, I could stand, I could take a few wobbly steps, so it had sort of come back a little bit. But it took me six months to walk again. And yes, I had been like a gym goer before. I liked jogging and things like that, but it was in the spirit of, you know, like many women do like making your body look a certain way or staying in shape or looking after your weight. It was more like an aesthetic endeavor and didn't come from this deep desire of actually being strong and able to lift heavy things.

Speaker 1:

Wow, I mean, I can't even imagine being hit with that. So at that time, once you kind of accepted where you were, did you also have that same mindset? You must have to be able to get yourself back to walking again and functioning again. You know, did you have that resiliency and that whole idea of just one small thing at a time?

Speaker 2:

Yes, I developed that. I remember moments in the hospital where I was really defeated because I had something I must have had like 10 spinal. Uh, how do you call this punctures when you know when they tap onto your spinal fluid to check what's going on?

Speaker 1:

which is an extremely unpleasant procedure.

Speaker 2:

I remember one I was so defeated and and and so sad I I was lying down and I said I'm just never going to get back up and the doctor said, no, come on and you can do it. But there were moments where I thought, no, I can't do this. But when I came home, I think this was my family, my kids. I had three small kids. That got me back into the present moment, back into this thing. Let's enjoy. Today. It's Christmas and that was also a very important lesson for me there, because it was Christmas, there was a tree, there was food, there were presents and I hadn't done any of this.

Speaker 2:

And as women, we always think, oh, we have to do it all, and if I don't show up tomorrow, the world will come crashing down. And that doesn't happen. And I didn't find that defeating. I find that liberating to know that, yes, you might not show up from one day to the next and rationally we all know this. But in our gut we still think, no, we're invincible and we're going to be there tomorrow and we're going to look after everything.

Speaker 2:

So I had learned that not only there would be times when I couldn't do anything, but that also everything would be kind of okay, even if I was not taking care of everything. And being with my kids really helped me. I focused on trying to give them some sort of feeling of normalcy, Because when you're in a hospital bed and you can't walk and your kids visit you, that's very, very painful and that helped me sort of focus on the present day. But because I found out that it was a one-off, I was not quite as scared of the future as I was with the MS diagnosis. That really forced me to understand that all I had was today, was this present moment and there's no point in looking ahead because it will only scare the living daylights out of you and you don't even know what's going to happen. That's what is the case with MS you don't know. So that really increased the focus and this desire to do what I can do today.

Speaker 1:

And so then you just started experimenting. Why did you turn right away to strength training? Does it have to do with you know what happens to you when you have MS, or is it something that you know, like I said? You said you were always active, but was it necessarily strength training? You said jogging. What made you turn to strength training in particular?

Speaker 2:

Until this day I don't really know where that spark sort of came from, but with you know, with hindsight, I'm interpreting it as me wanting, because when you just imagine this experience, you're in the hospital bed and you can't move, you feel like a thing and you cannot. You have no power at all, not even if somebody comes into your room. What can you do? Somebody talking inside your room to somebody else, turning on the light at seven in the morning when you just fell asleep, stuff like this. You have no power.

Speaker 2:

And I think, um, that's where this desire came from to to be like really able to, to count, to count on my body, to trust my body and make sure it was, it was very strong and could cope with things. Um, why, I mean, I could have thought of other things, maybe to become stronger, I I don't know, but because I knew the gym and and I I knew that there's also this idea of, of physical strength, you know, not only aesthetic reasons to to lift, but also to become strong. And I found a book also that sort of convinced me and it was one of the first that said women should lift heavy. It, I think, was this just this desire to take my power back and for me, that was the most obvious, the most obvious way that like, the simplest and until this day, this is also why I'm shouting it from the rooftops it's the simplest way, the easiest way to get a grip on so many things in your life if you just train your body to be strong.

Speaker 1:

And, like you said earlier, it's not just your body that's affected.

Speaker 2:

That's the most mind-blowing thing of all. I got better when I started lifting and I got better so spectacularly that my neurological visits they were like two minutes. I walked in and I walked out because they saw how well I was doing. And I think too I'm not claiming that you can cure MS with strength training, not at all but I'm convinced that the effect this had on my mental health, the confidence that it gave me, that helped me get better and get over this situation where you feel like things are happening to you and you don't have any say, to a mindset where you say, no, I can do this, I will do this, I will live my life the way I want to live it.

Speaker 2:

And this is also something I see with my clients when we work together. Many come to me because they want to lose weight. Yes, now more and more women also want to build muscle, because the message is still getting through. But the very first thing that they notice after two weeks sometimes of training is that they feel this energy surge and this weird confidence that they feel differently in your body, like connected. And that's the thing I think that's the main effect of strength training and it's documented even scientifically now it really does improve your mental health. So to me it's just a wonderful one-stop shop, the whole thing.

Speaker 1:

And it's very true. I mean, I'm just listening, smiling, thinking I'm a person who hated the idea of strength training. I like music, I like dancing, so I do like aerobics and you know, whatever cardio and that kind of thing no-transcript going to be looking, what is she doing? And of course they're not, but just in my own mind and that's the trick that I play, or the game that I play, and it's, it's intimidating, it can be very intimidating, and I happen to find a local woman who does functional fitness for women over 40. And it is strength training and she differentiates, which is fantastic, because we each have, especially as we get older, are certain limitations, and I think a lot of times, if you just go into a class and they don't realize you could hurt yourself.

Speaker 1:

So, even though I have to say I still go and I say I don't really love what I do there, but I love the way that I feel afterwards and I love I didn't realize. Oh, I was always holding on to the banister every time I walked up the steps. Oh, you don't have to be able to do that. You know things like that that made me feel good. Oh, I can get up off the floor and I don't have to make sure that there's a piece of furniture near me to hold on to right To get me up. So I really, even though, like I said, it doesn't, I'm not saying, yay, this is so much fun, like I am when I'm dancing to music, but that's okay, because I don't want to miss it, because I feel the benefit and I, you know, know it's good for me.

Speaker 2:

I think it's a great point that you're raising, because the main point nowadays for women, our age, it's not so much knowing that you need strength training I think it's really getting through but it's how do you actually start? And I think this is a big misconception, and when I was a newbie coach, I had this misconception too. I thought, oh, I just write great workouts for people and then they do it, and then they're getting better. No, it's about how do you actually start doing it, how do you get there? And so many women don't want to go to the gym, and I can understand that.

Speaker 2:

So what I do in my approach now is actually, I try to remove all those obstacles, all the resistance that you can encounter.

Speaker 2:

So I have my clients start with 15 minutes a day that they can do, like even in their pajamas if they want to, because that way they only have to make one decision in the morning. When you say on January 1st, I'm going to go to the gym three times a week this year, you think you have made one decision, but you actually condemned yourself to making 30 decisions every day that you want to go to the gym, you have to pack your bag, you have to drive through traffic, you have to find parking, you have to walk into the locker room, to walk onto the gym floor. This is so much resistance that you can experience there the first bad day that you're having. You're not going to go. It's because it's not one decision but so many that you have to take, whereas when you can do like 15 minutes at home, there's only this one thing that you need to do, and then it's out of the way and you're feeling good about yourself.

Speaker 1:

I love that because that's what I say about the class. Actually, I go at 6am and I can do it hybrid, but I do prefer to be there in person. It's about 15 minutes away from me and I just tell myself even the exercises that I don't like. Whatever we're doing, it's only for 30 seconds, for 45 seconds, for a minute? I can do anything for a minute, right, yes, and it's all just a mind game a little bit. Let's go back to so. You weren't always a coach, you were a journalist. Did you enjoy that career? What caused you to make the leap? I mean, clearly I know your own experience, but still, that's still. To give up a career like that to go to something new is very scary. I know that myself.

Speaker 2:

Yes, absolutely, and I've been thinking about becoming a coach for years and we, you know, we always imagine life decisions as being some, you know, oh, you come to a fork in the road and it's right or left where actually you have this gray zone in your head, sometimes for years before you really take the plunge. I love being a journalist because I'm a curious person, I love connecting with people, I like telling a story. We traveled the world, my husband and I, with our three kids. We moved every four years. We lived in Paris and Vienna and Berlin and Dubai. So that was great, that was really a good experience.

Speaker 2:

I was getting a little bit frustrated with journalism over the last year of my activity because information has become so much of a commodity. I know I'm dating myself, but I learned journalism with this idea that we are writing or giving information to make the citizen informed, to give them the possibility to make informed, responsible decisions in society and in politics, and it's become a little bit like selling marshmallows and selling information. You know, just have to have the like the sweetest, craziest piece of news that people are going to want to look at and I found that a bit frustrating. I also, after three or four years of daily injection I don't even remember because it's a while ago now when I had been injecting myself there are four years three times a week with that treatment and was getting better and better with my training, my neurologist here in Spain took me off my treatment and said you're doing so well, you don't need that anymore. And so I got my sort of second, second shot at life after the first experience, when I learned to walk again.

Speaker 2:

Now I could get off my treatment, and that was a moment where I thought this is such a gift and maybe I'm onto something with what I'm doing, so this thought that had been lingering of becoming a coach. Then I just had to do it. I think I have to share this message. This is so simple and so powerful, and if it's helped me and I'm getting this gift of being, you know, free of treatment and free of relapses and everything, I need to share this, and that's when I took the plunge. And then, of course, you have to learn all the. You know it's a curve. It's a learning curve. You do have to. I mean, I took the certifications and the online coaching certifications and everything that you need because I work online, but then you're a journalist and from one day to the next you're running a business, so, yeah, that takes some resiliency too.

Speaker 1:

Exactly. I mean, you know so many women, certainly in middle age, think it's too late, right, it's too late to make a change, or it's too late to try something new, and or and or put yourself out there in this scary, scary position what if it doesn't work out? I mean, I'm kind of personally took a leap, but yet I still do have my career, my main career, still with me to fall back on financially. So it's a big leap, but it's not as much of a leap of faith of leaving it completely behind and starting something new. So big, big, big kudos to you on that.

Speaker 1:

How did you get through You're just? Have you always been just so determined and resilient? I mean, what advice? I feel like there's so many people out there who are at a low point that don't see a way out and, like you said, you were at those low points so many times, but you yourself were able to get yourself out. What do you think that for you? Or what would you tell other people? How and I think about this a lot, because is it something that's just intrinsic in each person? Do you know what I'm saying? Are we all just born with this resilience and you can't teach it to somebody else.

Speaker 2:

I don't know what do you think it's my favorite subject, because I'm convinced that most of those things resilience and even weight control, even consistency in going to the gym I think they're all skills. I don't think that we come with a character that is flawed or in a certain way, where we just cannot do something. I think we can all learn skills. The thing is that our world has changed so much that those are like new skills that we have to learn, especially that you're in midlife now. So you were born in the last century. You were not really brought up with those skills because at the time they weren't needed. You didn't need to fight off the onslaught of food opportunity all day long. You know all these things that have changed.

Speaker 2:

And even resilience is something where, to me, it's building a safety net. You have to have points of like in a net. You know the knots that are in there that will sort of catch you. You need various of those. An example and I hear this all the time it's not something that, it's not a one-off.

Speaker 2:

I hear so many times women tell me I was in super shape. A few years ago I was working with a personal trainer. I felt fantastic and then she moved town and it all fell apart for me. So if you have just this one point in your safety net, that's just one person, it's one thing. When that falls away, you will fall through. But if you have various points, if you have people supporting you, if you have various gym buddies or other things, your family, certain habits or clubs or communities, you need to build as many support points as you can. So when one of those breaks away, you still have something to catch you. And I think you know building that safety net is a skill too, but I think it's a liberating thought. It's just nothing wrong with you. You don't have a flawed character or a weak personality. It's just a skill that anybody can learn and I think that should give hope because you know a skill. That's not a big deal, you can get it, you can do it.

Speaker 1:

Exactly. I couldn't agree more. I feel like when I realized which I was in my 50s, early 50s. I have control. Nothing else has power over me. I make the decision. Every decision I make is a vote for who I want to be. And we make a million decisions in a day, thousands at least. And it's up to me and it is liberating because then you're not pointing fingers and blaming everything and everyone else You're not blaming. I can't do it because I have this diagnosis. No, it's up to me and I'm going to do whatever I can and not get too ahead of yourself.

Speaker 1:

I think so many times we're thinking, oh, my goodness, look how far away that is, that goal, that ideal, whatever it is in your mind. Then it feels hopeless. But just looking at the present day or the present decision in front of you, they start to add up. They really do start to add up, and I think I was actually journaling this morning, not about working out but something else and thinking, putting myself back in that mindset, just like you're talking about that minute when you're down and out and you don't see a way out. Little thing that one first step right, that really did set the ball in motion. But that's up to you, because you have the power to either keep that train moving forward right or stop right there. Yeah, oh, my goodness, it's quite empowering.

Speaker 1:

So in the few minutes that we have left, why don't you share with the audience? Tell us about your, your program and your 15. I don't know, I didn't write it down. What's it? What was what's with the 15? Tell me about the 15. I got the 15 minutes a day for exercise, but tell us it's called fabulous in 15.

Speaker 2:

And it's an approach where you know we start as small as possible and we create momentum from there, because the one thing that we need is get a foot in the door. There's no point in, exactly as you said, these big plans. They are just scary and at the first sort of obstacles, first enemy contact, they fall apart. So I assess you, I find out what exactly you can do physically, because that's important in midlife. You don't just, like you said, any other workout that works perfectly for 20-year-olds could hurt you, get you injured or discourage you. So I assess you, I design a program just for you 15 minutes a day.

Speaker 2:

And then we do the same with nutrition. We make it small habits. There's no forbidden foods. We think how can I fuel my body for daily performance that I have to give my? You know, my duties, my family, my workouts, what's the best fuel for me? And and that's all we do. And then there's a lot of support because many midlife women feel quite alone in in in their journey. And it works like a charm, because it's doable, and I think the best workout is always the one that you do.

Speaker 1:

Exactly, exactly. That is a very good point, because how many of them are so great? But yeah, we do it once or twice and then we give up, and 15 minutes is doable. 15 minutes is worth your health, your life, your future. If you think about it, I think in those terms instead of focusing on this is hard, oh, this hurts, because I think now, when I walk away and I have those little, like you know, sore muscles, it makes me feel good. Yeah, it's sore and I don't like that, but at least I know I'm working, I'm doing something. It's, it's, it's happening, you know. And so, kim, where can everyone find out more about your program and get in touch with you? What is the best place for that?

Speaker 2:

You can go to my website, which is kimrahircom, and on there you'll actually find a free health and strength assessment that you can take, so you get an idea of where you are at, and it's about how your physical ability and your mental state also sort of fit into your daily life. How are you coping? And when you fill that in, I will give you some pointers next steps that would be appropriate for you. You can also book a call on there and, if you want to, you can follow me on social media with my name, kim Rahiro. I share tips and insights and a bit of my weightlifting adventures.

Speaker 1:

Wonderful, kim, thank you so much. Your story is inspiring and I would urge everyone to go check her out because she's a force of nature and an inspiration. So thank you again. Thank you so much for listening and we will see you next week. Thanks for spending part of your day with me here on Maybe I Can, exploring possibilities one sprinkle at a time. It's been great having you and I hope you're leaving with a spark to light up your journey to more. Remember every big change starts with a single maybe. If you're ready to kickstart that change but not sure where to begin, I've got just the thing for you. Head over to download my free guide, the One Critical Step to Kickstart Change and take that all-important first step. Let's make those maybes into reality, one sprinkle at a time. Catch you next Tuesday at 4 pm Eastern, 1 pm Pacific, with more stories, tips and that extra push you might need. I'm Debbie saying goodbye for now, but always remember maybe, just maybe, you can.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Debbie Weiss

Host