Maybe I Can® with Debbie Weiss

Ep. 118: 4 Habits That Changed My Life

• Debbie Weiss

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In this episode of Maybe I Can, I’m sharing the four habits that have had the greatest impact on my life over the past several years: meditation, journaling, gratitude practice, and waking up early. I’ll take you through how each habit has transformed my mindset, reduced stress, and helped me create a more intentional and fulfilling life. Whether you're looking to find more clarity, build resilience, or simply start your day with more purpose, these habits can make a difference. Tune in to hear my personal experiences, practical tips for getting started, and why small daily shifts can lead to powerful long-term change.

Debbie Weiss
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 https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/maybe-i-can-with-debbie-weiss/id1676123222

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Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome to Maybe I Can, exploring possibilities, one sprinkle at a time. If you've ever found yourself asking is this all there is to life, then you're in the right place. I'm Debbie author, speaker, entrepreneur and coach, and every Tuesday, I'm here to share a sprinkle of hope and inspiration. Together, we'll uncover the more More joy, more fulfillment, more prosperity, more fun. We'll share stories of transformation, actionable tips and that little nudge you need to take the next step. So let's embark on this journey of discovery and say maybe I can to a life filled with more, ready to find out. Let's get started. The Maybe I Can Show starts now. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to the Maybe I Can Show. I am your host, debbie Weiss, and thank you so much for joining me today. I truly appreciate it. I know how many choices podcast choices there are out there, so the fact that you're tuning in to me just means a lot. So thank you.

Speaker 1:

I was thinking just before I came on the air boy, have times changed? And what I mean by that is when I first started, even before I started podcasting, when I started making videos and showing up on social media the very first time that I made a video. I can't even tell you how nervous I was. I made sure I had the right outfit, I had the right makeup, my hair looked good. I didn't know what I was going to say. I tried to memorize it. Then I made little five by seven index cards. I recorded it over and over and over again and I thought to myself oh my goodness, this is exhausting. And I did that a couple more times until I realized this is not for me. And one day I was walking my dog, yogi, as I do every day, and every morning in particular, and in the morning I don't wake up with my hair and makeup done. So I'm out there, no makeup, hair, all crazy. And I had something that I wanted to share. So I just opened my camera, pressed play or record and started talking. And once I had that freedom, like gosh, I know me. I don't like to see those people who are in the right outfit, with the right hair, with their makeup done. Yeah, sure, sometimes, of course, but I want to know that real person. And from all the feedback that I've gotten, it seems like authenticity seems to be associated with me and my brand, which I'm glad.

Speaker 1:

And the reason I'm saying how I've evolved is that now a half hour show I'm coming on. I got no makeup. I don't even have a pink shirt on today. If you're listening, then you can't see. If you're on YouTube, obviously you can see this. Usually I am always decked out in pink. This morning I got up, threw my hair up, threw on a sweatshirt one of my big comfy sweatshirts and the day just kind of got away from me.

Speaker 1:

The other thing is is that I am just talk off the cuff. Now you know, yeah, I have some main points that I know that I want to make, but other than that, there is nothing scripted which you might be able to tell by listening to my episodes. The other thing I thought before I came on the air today was that, knowing what this episode is about, which I'll share with you in a second I know I'm going to repeat myself Meaning, if you've listened to previous episodes, if you've read either of my books, I'm going to probably say some things that I've said before, and in one way, I was a little bit insecure about that. And then, on the other hand, I thought now look, hopefully you're someone who lives and breathes everything I do, but chances are, most people, including probably my mother might be the only person right, mom, she's the only one who tries to listen and read everything. You haven't heard it all, and even if you had, even if I'm going to say something that you've heard or read before, tell you a story, I don't know what's going to come out of my mouth, so maybe it's going to be in a different way, maybe it's going to land with you a little differently today, because every time that we hear or read something, we ourselves are in a different place. So you just don't know. So I'm letting go of that too. All right, here we are. What was that? Free to be, you and me? That was some old catchphrase from something I don't even remember. If you know, dm me and let me know.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so the topic for today are the four habits that have had the greatest impact on my life since I kind of started this transformation about a decade ago. The four things are waking up early, meditating, journaling and gratitude. Meditating, journaling and gratitude. I was not a believer of any of those things, so I want you to keep an open mind. If you hear that list and you're like I don't meditate because that was me Journaling yeah, not a chance. And gratitude. I had no idea why anybody, what even that was. So I just ask you to keep an open mind, because what I've learned along the way is that when you do keep an open mind and you give something a try, sure, some things might not be for you, maybe the way you first try it isn't for you. But try a different method. You just never know. I have discovered more about myself in the last decade than I have in the 50 years prior. So hopefully you're listening to this podcast because that's where you are. You're just looking for some inspiration, some spark of something, because you know that your life, maybe you have a good life I mean, hopefully you have a good life and even if you have a good life, that doesn't mean that you can't add color to it. It can't be more fulfilling. You just don't know what else is out there for you until you go and try and find it and explore. So these four things they really have been a catalyst for me for everything that has come since.

Speaker 1:

All right, so let's start with number one waking up early. That could mean something different for each of us. I'll just tell you that I'm a morning person, so it's not like. Well, sure, as a teenager, yeah, I'd like to sleep in until noon or so, but as an adult, no, I am definitely a morning person. However, I did like to eke out every last minute of sleep that I possibly could. So I would say to myself okay, I have to leave for work at 8.15. What time do I have to wake up to leave for work at 8.15. What time do I have to wake up? Or what is the latest I can wake up to? Be out the door at 8.15?. And then I would backtrack. So, let's say, an hour, so get up at 7.15, then, all right, maybe hit the snooze once or twice. And now, right, I'm off to the races as soon as I hit the ground running, because maybe I'm a few minutes behind and if I do one thing five minutes longer, I could be late. And you're looking at that clock. You know you're like okay, the next thing, the next thing, whatever it is brush my teeth, take a shower, eat breakfast, whatever it is that your routine is.

Speaker 1:

And when I was, I think it all started. You know first let me stop that train of thought for a minute. When all of this started, with my whole beginning of my transformation. I didn't really know, I wasn't like had this big picture back then, realizing what I was doing. I slowly started like attacking different parts of my life to change and then, kind of, you know, it was like a domino effect Once one thing happened and I was like, oh boy, I feel so much better, I feel so much better about myself. Maybe I could try this, maybe I could try this. And then that's how I went down this path and I got to waking up early because I had a friend who, I don't want to say, made me try yoga. That's a whole other story that I have talked about. But kind of, with my new open mind, I tried yoga.

Speaker 1:

Eventually I found myself signed up for a 5.30 am yoga class three mornings a week. When that was first presented to me, I laughed out loud Like seriously, how early am I going to have to wake up and I'm going to be exhausted, like I had all the excuses right Until I tried it. And it was hard, don't get me wrong. It was not easy and this was not like this was before COVID. This was not in my house in a video. Luckily, the yoga studio was right around the corner so I could literally leave my house at 525, or I usually would leave at 520, roll in there five minutes early to get set up. But I thought it was impossible. But once I got into the habit, I loved it.

Speaker 1:

Forget the yoga part. I just loved having that extra time realizing, oh, every morning doesn't have to be this intense rush off to the races and it feels nice to kind of breathe for a minute, like, oh, I have 10 extra minutes. What am I going to do with those 10 extra minutes? And I will tell you what you're going to do with those 10 extra minutes. And I will tell you what you're going to do with those 10 extra minutes in a moment. But just to be able to take a breath, I mean, maybe for you it's having 10 minutes to just sit there with your thoughts, drinking your coffee, looking out the window, whatever it is. But having that extra time, waking up early, being able to just not start your day in this mad rush like this intense off to the races, like it's stressful. It really is stressful and when you leave yourself enough undistracted time in the morning, it really sets the tone for the rest of your day and it's a very different tone than hurry up.

Speaker 1:

I got to get up, I got to take a shower, I got to eat, I got to get dressed, I got to put my hair dry and you're in the car. Let's go. Oh my gosh, and what if there's traffic? And what if there's this, and all the things? So it really really does set you up for success. The way to get started is not to make a huge shift at once, right? So if you usually get up at 7.30, tomorrow are you going to get up at 5.30? No, probably not. It's too difficult. You've got to backtrack and take a look at your night and say what time do I go to bed? Don't start with a two-hour difference or a one-hour difference. Start with a 15-minute difference. If you usually go to bed at 11, try to go to bed at 1045 and then get up 15 minutes early in the morning. You know you've got to slowly incorporate these things.

Speaker 1:

All of these things, all changes, and I think this is why sometimes people don't do them, because they look at people who incorporated these changes and have been doing it for a long time and it seems unreachable to most of us. And then what? Why am I even trying? I'll never get there. So everything really has to be done in little small segments, little small sprinkles, little small increments. So start with that 15 minutes.

Speaker 1:

Now I don't go to yoga anymore, 5.30,. That class no longer exists since COVID, but now I have a 6 am exercise class. I go to three mornings a week. It's 15 minutes away. So I'm pretty much on the same time schedule that I was in the past and what I do is I think about it the night before. What am I going to wear? I lay out all my exercise clothes. My shoes are out, Like my drink, you know, my cup is out. I've got everything ready to go. So, all right, that's the first thing.

Speaker 1:

The next is meditation, meditation, oh my, I mean. I think about all of these and each one I can say, oh yeah, I was never going to do that when I did first start yoga and at the end you're in Shavasana pose, which, if you're not a, close your eyes and relax after exerting your mind and your body through all of the yoga class. And I remember when I first the very first class I went to in yoga and I was like what, close my eyes In this room full of people. I was beside myself, jumping out of my skin. I didn't know what to think. Everyone else I was like. They were so relaxed and it made me uptight. And the same thing happened when I thought all right, the world seems to be talking about this whole meditation thing. I don't get it. I thought, all right, the world seems to be talking about this whole meditation thing. I don't get it.

Speaker 1:

I listened, I think I I don't know if it was the Calm app or Headspace or one of them, and maybe it was just a two minute timer with music and again, two minutes felt like two hours. My mind was racing. I was thinking, oh my gosh, I'm doing this wrong. What am I supposed to be doing? You're not supposed to be thinking. I'm so bad at this. I could never do this. When is the buzzer going to go off? All of those things, for whatever reason. I stuck with it and I tried different methods and I eventually switched to an app and, oh gosh, and now I wish I could think of a name and I know it's like something happier, and it's Dan, what's his name? Who was on ABC. Okay, I'm going to have to get back to you on that.

Speaker 1:

And in that app they offered different length guided meditations Guided meaning and you could choose right. They weren't all like this, but what made it easier for me was guided meditations where someone was giving you instruction. They weren't talking continuously, but they would talk enough and then they wouldn't talk. And then they would come back in I don't know how often a minute later and just remind you to refocus whether you're concentrating on your breath or that was the other thing. Like most things were concentrating on, you know, breathing in and out, which is fine, and maybe that works for you. But some of them gave me alternatives. So one of the alternatives that I found really helpful was focus on sounds that you hear, like that was my anchor, so to speak, so that when I noticed that my brain was drifting or I went down that rabbit hole, I could go oh, think about your sounds instead of thinking about your breath. So it offered other alternatives, because not everything works for everyone. After a while I did really enjoy that.

Speaker 1:

I then moved on to transcendental meditation, where you actually go to get trained by a certified trainer and they give you a personal mantra and Technically it is supposed to be that you meditate twice a day, 20 minutes a day, and that is silent and you're just repeating the mantra silently in your head or you can repeat it out loud, and that was really really tough at first. It was really tough and I tried to do it twice a day and I never could seem to get the afternoon one in. I couldn't find the right place for it. But instead of just ditching the whole idea, I stuck with it and stuck with the 20 minutes in the morning. I did that probably for about a year and a half and then I started with another app, I don't know, and I got on this app for another reason I don't even recall why and I have to say that I seem to be back to more of a guided meditation.

Speaker 1:

I seem to be back to more of a guided meditation and if I have the amount of time that I would really like in the morning, it's about 25 minutes long and I have to be honest, I could do it longer, especially with the guided meditation. I could definitely definitely do it longer. I love it. It's so funny how the difference now I crave it. I literally crave it.

Speaker 1:

But if I don't have 25 minutes, if I have five minutes or 10 minutes or 15 minutes, I really try to make sure that I do something every day when possible, and what I found is is that over time, look, my mind still wanders. It's not about not thinking, and so I think we have to get past that. It's really about being able to notice. When you're drifting, when your thoughts are like I said, I just see myself going down that rabbit hole and sometimes something pulls me out and it's like, oh, my goodness, how long was I down there? But each time maybe you come out a little bit quicker, a little bit quicker. What I find is is that now I drop in faster, meaning I don't have kind of like this nervous anxiety thing when I first close my eyes, like, oh, am I going to be able to do it? Am I going to feel nervous? Am I going to get antsy? Nope, it's like boom, I turn the app on, maybe I hear a little two seconds of music. I close my eyes and I'm like Two seconds of music. I close my eyes and I'm like, come, I'm ready, bring it on, and that's a great feeling. And I think that you're able then, with that practice during your day, to draw from that feeling and to be able to then get back there there, whether it's when you notice that you're getting uptight or stressed, that even if you just close your eyes for 30 seconds and if it's taking a breath, if it's listening to the sounds quieting your mind, whatever it is, it can really, really help. Oh, my goodness, five minutes left. This time flies All right. Now I got to go fast.

Speaker 1:

Habit number three journaling, journaling, journaling, journaling. I don't know which one I thought was going to be harder or didn't want to do. I started journaling in a course that I took and the facilitator sent us in the mail because it was an online course her own journal with some prompts, and I don't have them in front of me, but they were simple Some of them. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to answer, which got me kind of uptight, and I was annoyed because she kind of didn't tell us what to put there. And then in the end I found out she didn't tell us because it was personal to us, and so that's when I really discovered that I loved having that five, 10 minutes first thing in the morning to not plan my day, because it's not like a planner, but set intentions. What did I want to make sure I got accomplished today? What were important things. What did I want to remember? What were some daily affirmations I wanted to keep with me during the day to remind me of whatever being confident or something about goal attainment or whatever it was that I was working on, and I really really liked that and just kind of like waking up early and setting the stage for my day. That's what I found journaling to be, and I did that for a year or so and then I expanded to different journals, tried different prompts and those kind of things and really, really enjoyed the exploration.

Speaker 1:

Until one day I heard a podcast of somebody talking about the benefits of like free flow or free form journaling, which gave me anxiety. Meaning open up a blank notebook and just start writing. I'm a good student. You better tell me what am I supposed to be writing. I had a lot of questions over this and the woman in the podcast said if you don't know what to write, just start writing. I don't know what to write. I don't know what to write. I don't know what to write, over and over again, and eventually you'll start to write something else. And that's exactly what happened, and the very first time I did it, I think, I looked up at the clock and 15 minutes had gone by. My hand hurt because I was writing so quickly and like pressing down so hard, and it was cathartic. I discovered things about myself that were going on in my brain that I had no idea. And now do I get to do it every day? Unfortunately no. Those days I go to my exercise class, I honestly don't have time for everything before I have to get ready to go to work, and I haven't made the shift to get up at four o'clock in the morning yet. I don't know if that will ever be a thing. But I also know that when I'm not sure of next steps, I'm not sure what's bothering me. I just know open your notebook and start writing and it'll come to you. It'll come to you and it's been a great tool.

Speaker 1:

Last but not least is a gratitude practice, something else I had zero buy-in. When I first heard it it was in another course. I'm like what are they talking about? Of course I'm grateful. I'm grateful for my house and my job and my family. You know, like all the things that I think most of us are grateful for. What am I going to do? Say that every day, write it every day. It seemed like a big waste of time and like some woo-woo nonsense, quite frankly, until my coach, shana, sent me a gratitude journal in the mail, which I was annoyed because I was like, oh no, it's a gift. Now I see her, she's going to ask me how I like it. I'm going to have to fill it out.

Speaker 1:

And what I found was is that, yes, in the beginning I did write the same things over every morning. I'm grateful for this. I'm grateful, same stuff. And after a while I started noticing things that I never noticed before. I hate to say it, I never noticed the wind blowing or what the trees looked like. Of course I noticed the wind blowing, but, like you know that breeze, what it did to the trees, or the sound of birds, or certain shapes of clouds in the sky, or just like all these things, and it became like I was almost on a search. And it has completely changed my outlook, it's improved my mindset. It really, I think, has just made me a happier person.

Speaker 1:

So, even if it's not a journal, if, before you get out of bed, or before you go to bed at night, as you're drifting off to sleep, just think about three things that you're grateful for, and if you do it consistently, I'm telling you it's going to change your life. All these things are going to change your life. They're going to give you more time, more happiness, more just just each in so many different ways. But, as I said earlier, don't expect to jump in and do everything all at once. Start small, start with one new habit, five minutes a day, maybe it's not even every day, a few times a week. Don't get discouraged. Try a different way, try a different setting. Experiment, promise me. Promise me you'll try, because I'm telling you that these have the power to change your life. These habits have changed my life and I would love to hear from you.

Speaker 1:

What is one small change that you're willing to make? Dm me at debbierweiss on Instagram or email me, debbie, at debbie r weisscom, and let me know how your life has shifted. Thanks for listening and I'll see you next week. Thanks for spending part of your day with me here on Maybe I Can, exploring possibilities, one sprinkle at a time. It's been great having you and I hope you're leaving with a spark to light up your journey to more. Remember, every big change starts with a single maybe If you're ready to kickstart that change but not sure where to begin. I've got just the thing for you. Head over to download my free guide, the One Critical Step to Kickstart Change and take that all important first step. Let's make those maybes into reality, one sprinkle at a time. Catch you next Tuesday at 4 pm Eastern, 1 pm Pacific, with more stories, tips and that extra push you might need. I'm Debbie saying goodbye for now, but always remember maybe, just maybe, you can.

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Debbie Weiss

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