Maybe I Can® with Debbie Weiss

Ep 137: The Wake-Up Call I Didn't See Coming

• Debbie Weiss • Episode 137

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This week’s episode is an honest one. No script, no agenda — just me, speaking from the heart.

After a tough few weeks (a sick dog, financial stress, and the sudden loss of a friend), I found myself spiralling. But through all of it, something shifted.

I talk about what helped me find clarity in the chaos, how I’m learning to reconnect with gratitude in a way that feels genuine, and why sometimes, we need the hard moments to remind us what really matters.

If you’ve been in a funk, feeling overwhelmed, or wondering if gratitude is just another self-help cliché… this one’s for you.

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Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome back to the Maybe I Can podcast. I'm your host, debbie Weiss, and I'm happy that you landed on my show today. I've been just before. I pressed record I thought, okay, I've got a lot going through my mind. I have no agenda, I just. This is the second week in a row that I feel like I have so much on my heart that I am just going to share with you. I have no idea how it's going to turn out and I ask you to kind of stick with me, because I have a funny feeling that it might sound maybe a little negative in the beginning, but in the end it's not meant to end, it's not meant to. I mean, look, I'm sharing from the heart.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes all of us get into a funk and that's kind of where I am right now. It doesn't matter that I most of the time make these sunny videos or podcasts or when I do interviews, whatever it is when I speak and I have uplifting, hopefully uplifting inspirational messages that I'm giving you. But let's be honest, we're all human and that means that we all go through highs and lows, and over the last month or so I find myself in a funk, which is strange because it's summer, fall used to be my favorite time of year because, yeah, my birthday's in the fall and I just love everything about the fall. I used to love going back to school and getting new books and notebooks and supplies and new dress you know, back in the old days Dress I mean, like in elementary school, not when I was older and new shoes and all the things right. And now you know, I love football. I'm a big football fan, big New York Jets fan. So I always look forward to that, even though since my husband died, it's a little harder to enjoy it as much. But it still always brings back such good memories.

Speaker 1:

And this year Ben, my youngest, will be home since he graduated from college and he's going to be here to cheer with me. As a matter of fact, he and I were just talking about. He was telling me that he and his girlfriend were on TikTok looking through game day recipes. Now, she's not a football fan, but you know, if you're going to be part of this family, she's got to learn. She's got to learn J-E-T-S, jess, jess, jets. And Ben just said well, she knows the cheer. I just don't know if she knows when you're supposed to appropriately use the cheer. I said that's okay, she'll be with all of us and when we start doing it she can figure it out. So I am looking forward to that and all the things that I've got. You know, a lot of great things coming up in the fall.

Speaker 1:

But as I've gotten older and I really dislike winter more and more, summer has become my favorite season. I've always been a beach lover and each year I really try and get to the beach every Saturday, weather permitting. Sometimes, if it's not nice on Saturday, I go on Sundays Not my favorite day to go, but hey, I got nothing to complain about and my cousin and I she lives closer to the beach than I do. She lives about a little over an hour away from me and there's a lot of beach traffic heading down that way on the weekends. So I leave my house, usually at somewhere between 630, quarter to seven in the morning and we've got a whole routine. All of my stuff is there, I leave it at her house, I don't have any of it here, and I give her money at the beginning of the summer and she packs, she goes shopping, she has the drinks, the food, she packs the cooler. She's got it all out sitting on her driveway waiting for me to pull up and we load it into the car and off we go and we are on the beach before 8.30 in the morning and it is amazing, just amazing.

Speaker 1:

Well, here it is the beginning of August and I think we've been to the beach twice, twice. It is like criminal. And it's been for a variety of different reasons. One, the weather pretty much didn't cooperate the last half of May, all of June, and then we had two Saturdays in July, I think that were family parties on Saturday, and then I chose not to go on Sunday, and then I was away on vacation, which I was at the beach in Myrtle Beach, south Carolina. So clearly nothing to complain about there. But you know, we haven't had our beach days and, as we look forward, there's a lot happening in the next few weekends in August, the next few Saturdays where I don't know how many we're going to get in. But boo-hoo, right, all right. Don't feel sorry for me, it's not meant for that. I'm just saying that I haven't had that beachy summer thus far that I really look forward to. But, much more importantly, I've had some things happen, unexpected, very big expenses, the air conditioning in my office needing to be replaced, which was very expensive. I had to buy a new car. Maybe I said this last week, I don't know, I don't even want to repeat it, wah, wah, wah. But in the last week and a half, yogi and if you listen and follow me you know that's my multi-poo.

Speaker 1:

He will be 14 on August 28. He, two years ago, almost died from severe pancreatitis. After that, maybe about eight months later, he almost died from severe pulmonary hypertension. And we've gotten through those things. He's on a lot of different medications. I am just like giving this dog medication all day long, it feels like. But he's doing good status quo, you know, holding his own, all the things.

Speaker 1:

And then about a week ago I'm not going to describe how I knew, but take him to the vet and he has severe pancreatitis again. But this time it's a little bit different because there's nothing that they can do to cure it. There's a medication they can give to stop the progression, which he did get, but they can't do anything other than kind of comfort, care, manage the pain, make them. You know, most times the dog stops eating, possibly drinking, so they would hospitalize them. So they would hospitalize them, give them IV fluids, pain meds, that kind of thing. But he can't get IV fluids because of his heart problem.

Speaker 1:

And now he's looking at me making a noise and because of his heart issue he gets anxious, and so the hospital really isn't the best place for him. And so the vets have said let's try and manage this at home. And I've basically been to a vet or the animal hospital every single day and I'm giving him more meds and trying to get him to eat and all the things. But when he's in pain he trembles and it's just so upsetting and just like with a baby. You just look at them and wish that they could talk to you, because the vet says it's my call, we're happy to hospitalize him and really be able to be on top of managing his pain. Obviously they're able to do injectable medications and more often and monitoring him and all of the things, and I don't want to do that unless he really needs it. And so that's where I wish he would tell me I can't take this pain anymore. I can tell that he's very uncomfortable, I can tell that he doesn't settle down, but so every day, every minute, I'm staring at him and look, he's going to be 14. I'm not a fool. I know that his life is coming to the end. I don't know when that will be. My hope is that he'll get past this bout of pancreatitis, just like he did two years ago, and we continue on as we were. But I don't know. It's horrible to see him suffer. It pains me and I'm not sleeping and I can't stop looking at him and, like I said, been spending most of my time at the vet and I can't stop looking at him and, like I said, been spending most of my time at the vet.

Speaker 1:

And then on Friday last Friday, got a call completely unexpected, that a friend of mine, someone I know through work, that Gary and I did some traveling with this couple before any of us had kids. And then, when we had kids, we actually had gone on a trip with them. It was a company-sponsored trip with the kids. And then when we came back, you know, their kids were similar age to our kids and we would go over and hang at each other's houses as families once every three or four months. And then, as the kids got older we live about 50 minutes apart and they got into their sports and their activities in school. All of that kind of stopped and then we rarely saw them and I just would speak to them every once in a while.

Speaker 1:

Well, I found out that the husband who's the one that I worked with was at hospice on Friday and he's younger than me, he's 60. And it was a shock because it was something that they didn't share with anyone. And boy, one, after speaking to his wife, brought me right back to when Gary, my husband, passed away. And two, it just was such gosh, just such a slap in the face, especially as right now recording this, if you're only listening to the audio you can't see, but I'm looking at all my gray roots because I haven't been able to go and get my hair done because of Yogi being sick and all different things, and just all the complaining I was just doing about the money and what Like and that I didn't get to go to the beach enough.

Speaker 1:

Seriously, sometimes I think that we need to almost be reminded almost a slap in the face, almost a slap in the face of how this is our one and only life. None of us knows how long we're going to be here and we want to make the most of it. We do. And all this bitching and moaning like I have just done for the past 10 minutes. It really puts things in perspective Again. You know, we get so caught up in these things that happen to us in everyday life that it's normal, I mean, it's human. But this is the whole thing about the idea of being present, right and living in the present moment, because when we do, then we are able to appreciate our lives, be grateful for our lives.

Speaker 1:

I mean be grateful for our lives, I mean all of these things just reminded me of a time where, when I was in my mid-30s, I was in agony for about two years. I couldn't even stand without collapsing, and it wound up that I needed to have a spinal fusion. And I remember thinking gosh, thinking gosh. If I could just be able to go to a mall. Of course there was no Amazon. Then this is what we did. We went to Walsh. If I could just go to a mall, for goodness sake, if I could just go to a supermarket, a place I don't even like going to, I would be so happy, I would be so grateful. And it reminded me of these things that I just took for granted. Right, it was a hassle if I had to run to the mall to get something sometimes or to the grocery store. To me that's always a hassle and it puts things in perspective, puts things in perspective Simultaneously.

Speaker 1:

The other day I was scrolling through Facebook and David Cassidy was my first love, so of course, on my feed things come up. You know how it works. You read one thing. Now everything I'm seeing is David Cassidy, and last week here in New Jersey he actually, I think until he was nine grew up in West Orange, new Jersey, with his mom, and in West Orange they had like a David Cassidy I don't know what you want to call it day celebration something, and they renamed the street that he grew up on David Cassidy Way and they put a plaque in the little league field where he played and his kids came and I mean, I wasn't there, but this is what I was watching on Facebook and through this rabbit hole then that I went down, it reminded me what really a terrible, very sad life that he had.

Speaker 1:

I came across something that said you know what were his last words, and I had heard this before and it was something like this which was so much wasted time, and it seemed like I needed that message. All of these things have come together at one time, come together at one time, and it was clearly. I needed some kind of jolt, some kind of wake-up call to tell me, to get the heck out of my head about all the things that I'm worried about, obsessing about I don't want to say nonsense, because I don't want to say that the things that we deal with in our everyday lives are nonsense, because they're not, but sometimes we just need to put them into perspective and take a step back and maybe that helps us get out of our own head, out of our own negative spiral. And clearly this week the universe is sending me this message, and so I'm asking that you join me in living in the present moment, being grateful for all that you do have in your life, to focus on that, to go outside and be grateful for the sunshine and nature and where you live and your loved ones, whatever it is, my goodness sake, be grateful for your job. Even if it's not your most favorite thing in the world, there must be some saving grace about it Someone you work with that you enjoy their company. Let's get out of this negative loop.

Speaker 1:

The woe is me, the oh. Why does all this stuff keep happening? Because that's how I felt, one thing after another, one thing after another. You'd think I'd know now, at almost 62 years old. This is life, this is how it works, but we are still here, we are still breathing, and I don't know about you, but until I take that last breath, I'm going to live life to the fullest, because you know what?

Speaker 1:

My husband, my father, all of the loved ones that we have lost, my friend what would he give to be here complaining, right, complaining, that I had to replace the air conditioner or I didn't get to the beach enough. He'd give anything. So this week I'm asking you, and I would love it if you would message me, as I always say DM me on Instagram at debbieorweiss, email me at debbie at debbieorweisscom. Let me know if this is relatable, makes sense to you and if you're able to really focus this week on taking that pause, living in the present moment and being grateful for everything that you do have. Do it with me. I can't wait to see you next week because I'm telling you right now I am so, so, very grateful for you.

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Debbie Weiss

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