A Birthday Reflection: Owning Your Story At Any Age

As I celebrate my upcoming 62nd birthday, I’m reflecting on what the past decade of reinvention has taught me about resilience, purpose, and self-discovery.

At 50, I realized my circumstances didn’t define me; I did. From caring for others to learning to care for myself, to writing books, creating new products, and rediscovering joy through purpose, every pivot and “maybe I can” moment brought me here.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, lost, or “too late” to start over, this episode is for you.
 Because at 62, I can tell you, the possibilities are endless!

NEW! The Sprinkle Effect Book!
https://www.debbierweiss.com/thesprinkleeffect


***NEW FREE WORKBOOK**

Kickstart Your New Life with One Critical Step: A Practical Guide for Women Ready to Redefine Their Paths and Embrace New Beginnings.

DOWNLOAD HERE TODAY: https://www.debbierweiss.com/kickstart


MAYBE I CAN BEGIN TO CHANGE MY LIFE

This transformative six-module journey of self-discovery and empowerment includes a printable worksheet and offers lifetime access to all materials. Designed for those facing major life crossroads or simply seeking greater fulfillment, this course is your path to a more purposeful life.

LEARN MORE HERE: https://www.debbierweiss.com/beginchange


Work with Debbie! See all the ways you can work with Debbie to help you live the life you know you're meant for: https://www.debbierweiss.com/workwithdebbie


On Second Thought... Maybe I Can Book on Amazon: https://bit.ly/maybeIcanbook

Connect with Debbie:
Website: https://www.debbierweiss.com/
Instagram: ...

Chapters

• 0:00 Birthday Reflection And Intent
• 2:20 From Caregiver To Self-Loss
• 4:06 The Aha At Fifty
• 6:15 Health First: A Long Weight Journey
• 8:10 Money Mess And Ownership
• 10:05 Making More: From Insurance To Ideas
• 12:05 Discovering Online Business And Coaching
• 14:00 Caregiver Coaching And Boundaries
• 16:05 Pivot To Speaking And Writing
• 18:00 Creativity, Products, And Purpose
• 19:40 Redefining Retirement And Possibility

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Hi, it's the I got the podcast. I'm your host, Debbie Weiss, and thank you so much for joining me today. As I record this, it's kind of a special episode to me because this week is my birthday. And I will be turning 62. And if you've been listening, maybe you know that I love my birthday. I'm not that person who doesn't want to share their age or doesn't want a big hoopla. Nope, I am just the opposite. I feel like your birthday is your one day to celebrate you. And now I know it really shouldn't be that one day. And maybe that's why I've enjoyed my birthday so much, because for so many years, reflecting back, because now I'm getting sidetracked. I don't know about you, but I find my birthday, just like New Year's, is a time to reflect and look back at the past year and take stock of where I was, where I am now, what am I looking, you know, to be, do, have in the coming year. So today, this is a little bit part of my celebration. So you and I are going to celebrate together. Not like we're gonna have cake and ice cream, although, you know, with sprinkles on it, obviously. I might have that in a couple of days when it's my actual birthday. Not might, definitely will, for sure. But let's celebrate by celebrating ourselves. Really. There's nothing wrong with that. As a matter of fact, I think it's something that most of us don't do enough. I know for sure I do not do that enough. I never pause, take time, look at my accomplishments, think of what I am proud of. Instead, I seem to have always a critical eye, how I should have done something, what I didn't do, that kind of thing. Or I'm done with this, check, off to the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. So now it's time to take a pause, look back, reflect on where I've come from and where I'm headed to. And I hope that it also allows you to think about the same thing in your own life. It's probably not your birthday, maybe it is, and if it is, happy birthday if you're an October baby. Either way, there is never a bad time to reflect. And that's what I want to do today. I want to share a little bit of my my reinvention story with you. And maybe this is a repeat for some of you. Maybe not, but let me, if you don't mind, indulge me here. So the majority of my life I was caring for my family members in one capacity or another. I was basically doing all the things that you're supposed to do, get a good job, check, get married, check, have kids, even though I went through quite a struggle and didn't become a mom until I was late into my 30s, buy a house, all the things that are the quote-unquote standard American dream. But what I found was that on the outside everything looked great, but on the inside, I was really crumbling and had lost myself because I was giving myself to everyone else. And I was allowing the situation and the circumstances of my life to dictate my life's path. And when I turned 50, for me, 50 was a real pivotal age. It just felt like wow, 50. I mean, now it's funny, turning 62. I think, oh, 50, what was I thinking? I was so young. But it was something about that number that made me realize, man, this time in my life or my life is flying by so quickly that I'll soon be at the end of my life. And I don't want to say what will I have to show for it, but will I look back and have regrets on things that I didn't try or didn't do? And I knew the answer was yes. I didn't have any particular things in mind that I wanted to accomplish. I just knew I needed to do something differently. And that did not mean stopping my caregiving for my family members. Absolutely not. But I was allowing that to take over my life. And that was my fault. And that was my first big lesson was taking responsibility, realizing that my circumstances, my age, that doesn't dictate the direction of my life. I dictate the direction of my life. You dictate the real direction of your life, regardless of anything else that's going on. You could be feeling like you're in the worst place ever, and digging yourself out, turning things around, feeling better seems impossible. Impossible. I know I was there. Believe me, I was there. I would listen to podcasts, I would read books, and I'd think to myself, oh sure, easy for her to say, easier for her to do. She doesn't have this situation that I'm in. You know what? Maybe not. Maybe you don't have the same exact situation. I'm sure you don't. It doesn't matter. We all have circumstances. That's the definition of life. It is what we do with those circumstances and how we move forward. And that's when I realized I got to give it a try. I've got to change something. I don't know what it is, but I've got to give it a try. And so initially, I decided that the first thing I needed to work on was my health, more specifically, my weight. I've always had a very big weight problem. Back then, I was over 100 pounds overweight. And that was the first area that I tackled. And in about three to four years, I lost 90 pounds. I didn't reach my goal, but you know, I'm still trying. Here it is, a decade later, I'm still trying, and that's okay. It's a journey. Once I felt good about that, I moved on to the next thing and the next thing. And eventually, back in 2019, I found myself in a real financial mess. And I wasn't taking responsibility. There were so many reasons why that mess existed. But they were just excuses that I was telling myself. You know, I had been on that journey for five years, six years, and I still was sticking my head in the sand like an ostrich when it came to my money situation. And when I had that realization, I said, okay, I've got to make something change. And so I started small, right? I started with a very small sprinkle. I started by selling some things on Facebook Marketplace, not for a lot of money. And it was exciting and it was fun. And I felt like I was doing something positive to move me in the right direction. At the same time, I actually thought, oh my goodness, do I have to declare bankruptcy? I didn't even want to think about that, but I saw a bankruptcy attorney. And at the time I owed some back taxes, and I started addressing that situation. And even though none of those things resolved it, I was doing something about it. I was taking ownership. I was taking responsibility. And really? That's what eventually led me here talking to you. Because I thought, okay, I'm an insurance agent. When you have money troubles, what do you have? Two choices. You can either make more money, figure out how to make more money, or spend less money. And at the time, spending less money, I didn't feel was an option for a variety of reasons, having to do with some of my family members' mental health situation. So I said, okay, I'm going to figure out how to make more money. The idea of staying late and making cold calls trying to sell more insurance, it didn't do it for me. I didn't feel excited by that. I tried for a little bit and I realized my heart isn't into this. And at the same time, I had started using this particular supplement, like a health and wellness supplement. And it really, really made a difference in my motivation, how I felt. And of course, it was a network marketing company. I never had done network marketing, but I thought, let me give it a go. And I signed up and I started posting some stuff on Facebook. I got a few inquiries, but nothing. And at the same time, I learned about this mastermind. And I didn't know what a mastermind was at the time. I later found out it's a business group of people, and maybe it doesn't have to be business, but in this case it is, coming together and learning from each other and giving each other support and ideas and working together and all the things. And I thought, okay, I'll join this mastermind and they'll teach me how to sell this product. And when I joined the mastermind, I was literally overwhelmed and shocked at all of the different jobs that the people on this mastermind had. They were all pretty much online business people. Some were selling products, not many in this particular mastermind. It was really more geared towards people who were doing things like coaching, all different kinds of coaching that I had never heard of, like coaching for divorced people and money coaching. I never heard of money coaching. I just knew the traditional money roles that people played. But a money coach, what the heck is that? You know, of course, life coaches, which I was familiar with, resilience coach, burnout coach. I was like, wow, these people are making money doing this? Like, what qualifies them? I was really stuck on that. And that, quite honestly, is probably an age thing because in my generation, that's what it is. What's your degree? What's your certification? All the things. So when I was exposed to that, I realized, wow, what in my life, my experience, can I use to help other people? Well, family caregiving. I've been a family caregiver for over 40 years, and it took me a long time, probably about 30 years, to figure out how to successfully navigate this, meaning not to lose myself, to prioritize my self-care, to learn that it's not selfish. This is what I'm going to do. I'm going to support caregivers in this way. I was not interested in helping them be better caregivers in the sense of resources for their loved ones or support groups or anything like that. I didn't want that. I felt like teaching them to prioritize their own self-care was an underserved market and idea. And that's what I did. And I jumped in. I didn't know what the heck I was doing. I actually hired a coach who helped first-time coaches get their business off the ground. And I invested time and money into getting some type of caregiving certification, which I really didn't need, but again, that felt more legitimate to me, let's say. And so I thought, okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to put this out there into the world, and I'm going to have all these caregivers come to me. And when I started working with people, what I found was that, yeah, they were interested in more self-care. But really, the people that I was speaking to really were almost needed more of a support group or a therapist to talk through their feelings and their struggles. And I had no boundaries, right? It was maybe I would get on a call and it was supposed to be an hour, and an hour and a half later, I'm still on the call because they're pouring their heart out to me. And I had to listen. And after several of these, I realized I can't do this. I don't have the capacity for this because I was in my own care, still in my own caregiving journey. And I'm empathetic and it was just too much. And so I pivoted. And I'm not going to tell you every pivot, but I pivoted, and then it was, I want to share my message that, you know, your life is not determined by your age or your circumstances. It's determined by you. How am I going to tell people that? Because I felt kind of dumb, honestly, that I hadn't realized this. I had no idea that there was something called a victim mentality, and that's how I was living my life. And so I wanted to tell other people. It was like I wanted to grab them and shake them and say, no, no, I can help you. It doesn't have to be this way. And now it's okay, how am I going to do this? And then I learn all about business, and there's so much competition. I didn't want to be a life coach and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I decide I want to be a motivational, inspirational speaker. But why is anyone gonna hire me? And that's how I started with the writing of a book that I never thought I'd do. I can go on, but each step that I have taken since this aha moment at 50 has led me on a different journey that never thought I wanted, never could have even imagined. And even if it was something that I pivoted away from, like the caregiving coach, it taught me something. Boy, it taught me a lot. And I found out through this journey just how strong I am, how resilient I am, how determined I am, and how much I want to help other people. Specifically women who find themselves where I was. But how am I gonna do that? And this is the overall journey. And each step of the way, with so many ups and downs, I've had failures and successes, and I've kept going because it's so cliche to say this, but it's true. The journey itself is what is exciting. Sure, holding my finished products, my books, my newest thing, my sprinkle card deck, my new gratitude journal, all the things, it's very fulfilling. Absolutely. But it brings me joy, and I really I'm truly amazed. I'm amazed at how I've discovered these things about myself, creativity. I never knew that I could write, I never had in my mind that I could, I don't know, design or anything or create products that people might actually like and enjoy. And that's where I am now. Now it's okay, here I go. I'm on a path to gain more speaking engagements, but I'm also on a path to create more products and bundles, bundle type gifts that you can give to yourself or to others to help them start this journey or move along in this journey of life and of self-discovery. Because really, that's what it's all about. The journey, the excitement. A friend of mine, you know, she was speaking to her financial advisor about when she can comfortably retire. And I thought to myself, I never want to retire. Now, do I ever want to retire from my insurance agency? If I'm being honest, sure. I will never want to retire from what I'm doing now. No matter how many times I fail, no matter how many times I pivot, it doesn't matter because it is so fulfilling to me. It's so empowering. And just the possibilities of life now, honestly, at age 62, feel endless. And whoever would have thought that. 62, that age kind of feels like, oh, maybe I'm slowing down. No way. No way. 62 is young. There is never going to be a time where I stop creating and figuring out what I can do to help other people. That's all I want to do. That's my goal. That brings me joy, and I want to bring that joy to other people. Hopefully, I'm doing that for you. I want you to reflect whether you're turning a certain age, you are a certain age, none of that matters. How have you evolved over the past several years? And can you celebrate that? And where do you want to keep moving? Maybe you want to pivot. Maybe this is making you think, well, why not? Hey, my first book is called On Second Thought. Maybe I can. Because I've learned that you can do anything that you set your mind to. And it just changes your life when you all of a sudden are moving in a new and exciting direction. And I want that for you more than anything else. The fact that you're listening to this means that you're reflecting, you're growing right along with me, and having you here as a listener is the best birthday gift of all. Thank you so much. And now I'm off to celebrate with some sprinkles on my ice cream. See you next week.